There was this woman see, and she takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work. Without her knowing, her 9 year old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband comes home unexpectedly, so she hides the lover in the closet, where the little boy is also hiding.
The little boy says, "Dark in here."
The man says, "Yes it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$250."
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover end up in the closet together.
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball glove."
Man - remembering last time, asks, "How much?"
Boy - "$750."
Man - "Fine."
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your ball and glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball."
The boy says, "I can't. I sold them."
The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"
The son says "$1,000."
The father says, "That's terrible to overcharge your friends like that. That is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."
The priest says, "Don't start that **** again!"
A little secrets
A little boy wakes up three nights in a row when he hears a thumping sound coming from his parents bedroom. Finally, one morning he goes to his mom and says, "Mommy, every night I hear you and daddy making noise and when I look in you're bouncing up and down on him."
His mom is taken by surprise and says. "Oh ... well I'm bouncing on his stomach because he's fat and that makes him thin again."
The boy says, "That won't work."
His mom says, "Why?"
The boy replies. "Because the lady next door comes by after you leave each day and blows him back up!"